No More Love

We can’t even kick it no more.

If you don’t know what’s been happening in concern with Colin Kaepernick, you’ve obviously been living under a rock.

So for those of you sub-rock dwellers, here’s the jist: Kaepernick, quarterback of the San Francisco 49ers, chose not to stand during the recitation of the National Anthem during their 3rd preseason game in protest of the oppression that Black Americans still face in this country.  In a subsequent practice, he wore socks depicting the cops as pigs, and in the last 49ers preseason game, he kneeled during the National Anthem.

Now, since many of you don’t know my football stances, here is mine on Colin Kaepernick: I don’t like him.  Simple as that.  Not too fond of him as a person, and definitely not fond of him as a player.  He’s overrated and just not that good.

However, it pains me to say, when he sat for the National Anthem, I supported what he did.  It doesn’t pain me as far as the reason is concerned, it pains me that I support a player that I don’t really like.

When this whole shenanigan happened last week, I asked my family what they thought about Kaepernick’s action.  The verdict: none of them supported it.  Main reason: Because it shows disrespect toward this nation and the troops that fight for it.

So as most things, I was in the minority in familial opinions.

But here’s the thing, when I stand for the National Anthem, I don’t stand in support of the troops.  I stand in support of the country that I live in.  A country where my parents came to in order to provide a better life for my siblings and me.  A country that I am incredibly blessed to live in.  None of these feelings have changed.

However, as with all things we love, there are qualities about this country that I hate.  And the systemic oppression of people of color, especially black people, is disgusting.  Years and years after slavery, the Jim Crow era, Japanese internment, and more, and still the oppression still exists against people of color.  And with all the recent events occurring with the police and black people, it hurts my heart that we still live in a world where we can’t all live as equals.

Which is why I support Kaepernick in sitting when the National Anthem was sung.  Not because I hate this country, but because there are things that need to change immediately.  When people say that not standing for the National Anthem is unpatriotic and shows lack of support for our troops, I take offense.  Despite the fact that I don’t support the war that this country never should have gotten involved in, I 100% support the people that are overseas fighting for this country.  However, when we say that everyone that lives here can enjoy the freedoms that are provided, it’s quite a stretch.  Because the simple fact is that people of color don’t enjoy the same freedom that our white counterparts do. Support of our troops is a patriotic act, and Kaepernick came out and said that he did support the troops.  But he doesn’t support the oppression of black people, and no one should.

For those who support the cause but say it should have been done in a different and more appropriate venue, let’s discuss.  Colin Kaepernick is a football player.  Yes, he may have presence elsewhere, but his biggest presence is on the field.  In order to convey a message to the most people, the most logical place to do so is where he has the most presence: during a game on the field.  There are so many athletes that have spoken out about this oppression, but as much as I hate to say it, I believe that Colin’s actions has been far more effective than any of the other athletes’ actions, and in this I include Michael Jordan’s message (which I have some issues with, but that’s for another time) and the message that began the 2016 ESPYs given by LeBron James, Dwayne Wade, Chris Paul, and Carmelo Anthony.

Some of you may be wondering why I decided to wait so long before posting something about this.  There are two reasons:

1. I wanted to hear what Kaep said about his actions and see what he did the next game.
2. I’ve been really busy.  Shameless explanation for lack of posts.

When Kaep and his teammate Eric Reid took a knee when the National Anthem was sung for the last preseason game, I think it was an effective way of showing support for the troops.  As far as conveyance of the primary message, I think it kind of takes away from it. While I see why Kaep took a knee instead of sitting, I think that he should’ve just stuck to his initial plan of action.  He can come out later to confirm his support for the troops, while still conveying the unjust treatment of people of color in this country.

So many critics of the Black Lives Matter movement say that the protests should be peaceful and non-violent, but when they are, as in the case of Colin Kaepernick, there is still backlash.  So to the critics: in this country, we all have the right to free speech and peaceful protest.  Let us speak.

I support what Kaep did.  I support the movement that Kaep fights for.  I do not support his decision to wear those stupid socks.  However, I understand his feelings toward the police.  But to say all police are the same is a huge generalization.  Just as it is for people to say that all black people are hoodlums and thugs (which is hugely wrong and incredibly racist).  I think he made the right decision in where he decided to convey his message. Overall, I think what he did was necessary in an era where people are too afraid to stand up for what they believe in (see Michael Jordan).

I sit with Colin.

Your Position is Pivotal

I’ve never been the greatest judge of character.

I befriend people that are known to be bad people, and when they fuck me over, no one except me is surprised.  But, because I don’t judge very harshly, I befriend anyone I really want to, regardless of the way they look or act.

Now, let me describe to you how I grew up.

Most of my formative years were spent in a suburb 20 minutes outside of Philadelphia.  It was mostly white, but there were a decent few handfuls of black people and a sprinkling of Korean people.  Because of it’s proximity to Northeast Philadelphia, socioeconomically, the area was a mix of affluent people to working class people, which brought about a huge socioeconomic diversity in a town that was not incredibly racially diverse.  But, I ended up feeling comfortable around the likes of these racial groups.  When I moved back to the Bay Area in 2010, I was surrounded by Asians (I include Indians in this group, against my own discretions) and Latinos, groups that I never had substantial experiences with.  But, I grew used to it eventually.   Then, I lived in San Francisco for four years, and was exposed to all types of people.

Moral of the story?  I grew to be pretty comfortable around pretty much every color of people.

Now on to the real story.  Trust me, it all comes together in the end.

Living in the city has introduced me to regularly walking alone.  Whether it be walking to the train, car, store, or anywhere really, I’ve grown accustomed to the lone stroll.

And, because I’m used to people of all colors and am a terrible judge of character, I never care to cross the street when people are approaching me.

And there are plenty of times when I should’ve crossed the street, because as a woman, I’ve been followed by my fair share of questionable men.  Most of the time, they would stop following me after a block, but some would keep following me until I got to the train or any other destination.

These incidents open another can of worms about sexism and equality for women, but I’m not going to talk about that today, it’s not the point of the post.

The point is, in spite of these experiences, I would never cross the street.

I don’t cross the street for anyone.  I would say I don’t cross against better judgement, but let’s not forget my lack of judgement.

In May, I moved out of the clamorous city and into the too tranquil lands of suburbia.

On the days I don’t feel like going to the gym, which has been the case lately, I’ll go on a 3 mile nighttime walk.  I don’t usually encounter a lot of people, but when I do, I don’t think anything of it.

However, on two of my past walks, I encountered a scenario I have never been victim to.  A person approaching me crossed the street.

Mind you, I live in a predominately Latino community, and as a brown person, I blend in with everybody.  And just look at me.  Even with my serious RBF, I am not an incredibly intimidating person.

What do I wear, you ask?  Usually a colored hoodie or crewneck and running shorts.  It’s nighttime, I want to be seen by cars.

And two times in consecutive days, I’ve had people cross the street on me.  The first instance was an older teenage boy who was definitely not white.  The second was a white couple, stereotypical blonde hair and the whole she-bang.

I have never had people cross the street on me.  I have never experienced that kind of racism before.  I felt humiliated and mortified that people would even think that I would hurt or endanger them.  And almost immediately, my feelings changed to hatred and anger.  Why would anyone remotely label ME as a threat to their safety?  ME?!?! I am not a violent person, and I would never, ever think to hurt anyone (unless the situation called for someone to get knocked the fuck out).

But ignorant people see me in my mocha colored skin, big and curly hair, hoodie, and running shorts and think of me as a threat to their lives.

Don’t get me wrong, as a brown POC I’ve experienced racism in other venues, especially the “random” bag checks and pat downs at the airport.  But I have never had someone cross the street on me.  Ever.

But let’s be real, this doesn’t happen often to lighter complected brown people as often as it happens to darker complected people.  We’re talking the black people, especially men, who are dressed in their hoodies, T-shirts, and jeans.

If I felt humiliated and angered by the couple times it has happened, to me, I can’t even imagine how black people feel when it happens to them, disproportionately more often than anyone else.

I wonder what goes through the other person’s head when they think to cross the street. What do they see in people when they deem them as dangerous?  It it the color of their skin?  Is it the way they are dressed?  It it the way that they walk?  Or is it a combination of all three?

I guess I’ll never really know, since I suck at judging people.

I wonder how black people feel, or really any other POC that has had this happen to them. Do they feel the same way I did, or do they accept the fact that it just is simply that way, like my experiences at the airport?  When I am stopped at the airport, despite the fact I’m being searched extra because of the color of my skin, I’ve come to begrudgingly accept the fact that this is going to happen.

Plus, I’m not trying to draw any extra attention at the airport than I already am.

I guess I’d rather see these racist peoples’ faces than let them hide behind a mask like the people of the KKK, but it hurts to see the blatant disrespect toward a person just because of the amount of melanin in their skin.

It hurts.

 

Candles in the Sun

Is there a God?  Is He watching?  Is She watching?  Are They watching now? 

Alton Sterling and Philando Castile are two more names to add to the ever-growing list of black men murdered by unjust police brutality.

Alton Sterling, father of four children, was shot six times in the back and chest after being effectively pinned down on the ground by two policemen.  Video footage shows Sterling uncooperative toward the police after being told to get down and being tased.  Early reports had said that Sterling was armed, however subsequent reports have stated that he was indeed unarmed.  After failed attempts at reasoning with Sterling to get down-who reportedly kept asking, “What did I do?”- the police used force and brought him down violently to the ground.  While pinned to the ground, Sterling was not resisting, and would not have been able to reach for any type of weapon had he been armed.  Once of the officers yelled, “Gun, gun!” and subsequently, Sterling was shot six times.  After the shooting, the officer could be heard panting, “Fuck, fuck.”  Upon arrival of the paramedics, Alton Sterling was pronounced dead.

In St. Anthony, Minnesota, Philando Castile was pulled over for a broken taillight.  When asked for his license (mind you, his girlfriend, Diamond, was driving), Castile informed the cop that he had a pistol and was licensed to carry.  The police officer told Castile to put his hands up upon learning this, and when Castile was pulling his hands out of his pockets to put his hands up, the officer shot Castile four to five times in his arm and side, killing him.  Castile’s girlfriend filmed the events that took place post shooting, and the cop could be heard saying, “I told him to put his hands up!”  Diamond replies to him, saying something along the lines of, “You told him to get his ID, he told you he had a gun and a license to carry, and he was putting his hands up when you shot him.”  Bear in mind, Diamond’s four year old daughter was also in the car at the time of the incident.

These stories are heard all too often: black men being detained violently and end up being shot and killed.  The argument is heard all too often that if these men just listened to the police, they wouldn’t have been shot.

Philando Castile was following the orders of the officer and still managed to get shot.

I’m sure that there are plenty of other black males who also followed police commands and still have been victim to the lead.  But even if the suspect isn’t following commands, there are other ways to forcefully detain a person without using a gun.  And even if gun usage is warranted, why can’t the police shoot to injure?

I have been told by a nurse at my old job that when a cop uses their gun, they must shoot to kill.  Why is that a thing?  I understand that in some cases, extra force is needed to detain a person, but why do we need to shoot to kill?  All of these instances on video where these men have been shot, none have warranted the use of guns.

Which calls into question the training of these cops.

The officer that shot 16 rounds into Laquan MacDonald’s body was on the scene for six seconds prior to shooting.  Another cop had said that the situation didn’t warrant the usage of a gun, taking into account that MacDonald had a knife.

Why do these cops not know how to properly detain a person?

Why is so much violence needed to stop a black man, but a white man is reasoned with rationally and not shot at?  This incessant racism against the black man needs to stop.  Black men are not inherently more violent or dangerous, but they are treated as such.  When will the obvious heightened brutality to this oppressed group of people stop?

But, another question arises in my mind: Will the coverage of these heinous crimes (thanks, Law and Order: SVU) halt when there is no longer a black man in office?

Many attribute the rise in coverage of police brutality against black men to the fact that Barack Obama is in office.  And I thank him for that.  Thank you for bringing to light a social injustice that has been present for years.  Thank you for pushing for change, despite speaking upon the deaf ears of the Republican ruled House and Senate.  When Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump (God forbid) become President, will the woes of this oppressed group of people be silenced again?

I fear for the lives of these people, I fear that the progression that may have been made in bringing these injustices to the forefront will be reverted to the old days.  After all, Donald Trump is promising to “Make America Great Again.”

We as a society, especially my fellow people of color, need to band together to keep this topic alive, to fight against the unfair injustices against the black man in these police brutality instances.  We need to vote for the right people, vote to get legislation passed to protect us as people of color, especially black people.  We need the cops to pay for the mistakes they make.  We need to join together, and protest to make a change.

Black Lives Matter.